I don’t need to see proof either, but a little compassion would be nice. I don’t know whether or not they’ve experienced depression but either way, they don’t need to pass judgment or say what you’re going through isn’t valid.
I’d say they’ve definitely experienced depression since they’ve been diagnosed bipolar and this requires episodes of depression. Did I mention I know the criteria?
I think I’ve experienced enough erasure already. It’s taken nearly a year for my family to accept that I have depression, and all the time I’ve been getting “you’re just a bit upset” and “you just need to get out more.” I am sick of erasure, and you’d think the bipolar community would welcome someone learning about their illness and support them as they come to terms with it.
This is such a crucial stage in the acceptance of mental illness. If I was convinced I was neurotypical, my situation could worsen and I would blame myself rather than the illness. It is so dangerous to go around policing who gets to justify their traumatic experiences based on an assessment by a single professional.
Agreed. I’ve been really lucky that mental illness runs in my family so my mother gets what I go through. My grandmother has mental illness too but she’s so stuck in her own world that she doesn’t understand when other people are depressed, only when she is. It’s frustrating as all hell.
I don’t think our illness should define us but it is a part of our lives and it isn’t something we choose and so when people say it is it’s hurtful and feeds into what depression already wants you to believe — that you are worthless and lazy and that it’s your fault and not a legitimate health issue. Only that’s not true. It is a health issue. It’s not laziness or any other label people try to push.
Lazy is not bothering to grab the remote for a few minutes until you get really bored with what you’re watching. Lazy is not when you can’t bring yourself to get out of bed or shower for days or weeks.
Sorry, I could rant about this for a long time.
I always come back to the simple issue of poor education. Most accusations of it being a choice stem from really flimsy correlations, like diet or drug use. In my experience diet and drug use have been affected BY depression, and not the other way around. With low moods it’s obvious that I wouldn’t be cooking healthy meals and moralistically abstaining from drugs.
I’m pretty certain my brother and dad have it too, as they have mood swings and rage issues that rival my own. Part of the erasure, though, comes from their inability to admit it. They’d rather sweep it under the carpet and chalk it up to not enough exercise or having a pessimistic outlook.
The difference between laziness and depression is indeed something you have to experience to really get it. I originally went to the doctors about it because I had an argument on tumblr and had to physically lie down. A few days later I missed one of my exams because I couldn’t bare to walk up the hills to campus!
Exactly. Every alcoholic I’ve ever known doesn’t drink like a fish because they like the taste. It’s because they have a deeper issue. Addiction is a symptom of something bigger.
Yeah, I feel like men sometimes have a harder time coming to terms with their own mental illness. My mother has a male friend who’s been depressed eve since his mother died decades ago. She desperately wants him to get help - therapy, antidepressants, whatever but he can’t deal with it.
I’ve been there. It’s hard. When I’m really depressed I couldn’t handle showering because that would require taking my clothes on and off and that just takes more energy than I’d have. So yeah, walking up hills would be out of the question.